awashrpg | USER: #E00707 - insert an ominous fairy tale title here

[ USER: #E00707 in this lovely color ]

so hey we never discussed how a magical hen would induce feelings of romance
like how technicolor is this bird
could you hold it up so it could be a discoball
i guess id fall shades over heels for that kind of chick
youd think thered be more magical rainbow bird weathercocks around if that were a huge thing here though
i want a magical rainbow bird weathercock
also i think the forest is against us looking for a disco bird
because the forest is antidiscobirds
which is oppression tbqh
i am being oppressed by a bunch of dickass trees
which is BULLSHIT
but also pretty much par for the course

anyway waiting for quest day and the new month to come is so oldschool
so
i am officially opening quests up for business
thats right mr f you aint the only one who can assign vagueass poetical quests with random requirements

quest fuck you forest and your disco bird oppression:
find the sacred discochick
dancing queen of only seventeen
or whatever that is in bird years
requirements: hopping dance music

quest im bored and you should all entertain me:
tell the coolkid a fairy tale of your own creation
(authors note dirk isnt the coolkid)
(some offense dirk)
requirements: the ability to string words together to form sentences

quest usually we have to fight something:
i made a scarecrow and put it up in the garden
go defeat it in honorable combat
requirements: no sense of shame

quest something something feelings quest:
hug a tree
maybe if we hug enough forest trees
the forest will stop being a little bitch about us wandering inside
requirements: touching mood music

anyway if you complete one of my clearly superior quests you can go to the garden to get a prize
were on the honor system here folks
dont take shit you dont earn
or do im not the boss of anyone

ps if anyone figures out a way to get or make more film for cameras on the regular
hmu
peace out

pps the forest thing was john and i kept getting bounced back when we went to maybe consider finding this awesome discobird
and eventually went well fine fuck you too
after like
three attempts

ppps is there an upper limit to how many postscripts you can put on something im not even sure

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

brotherly discord
shit hope they make up

He was quite upset when he woke up to find all the apples leftover had been taken. To make matters worse, Satori was scheduled to appear on the peak of the mountain that very evening. However, the brothers had made up a plan of action. One they could only pray would work in their favor.

When night came came and the moon rose, a brilliant pale blue light began to shine from the top of the mountains. This was the signature sign of Satori's arrival to the mortal realm, and the cue for the brothers to meet him. Though there was fear in their hearts for what Satori could do, they still went up to meet him.

There at the peak to meet them was Satori. A giant stag of ethereal pale blue, with golden laurels for horns, a thick bearded mane that covered most of its face, and four orange eyes that stared into the wild. The Lord of the Mountain addressed them: "Present your offering to me."

The brothers looked at each other, unsure if their plan would work, but nevertheless the younger brother approached. Before Satori he set down the bag of rupees that the village head had given him.

"Satori," the younger brother spoke "I'm sorry, but there are no apples to give you this month. The head of the village that rests below your mountain were in desperate need of food after the hot season killed their crops. My brother gave them half the harvest and wanted to save your half for the offering, but I took the apples and brought them to the village.

I know these coins mean nothing to you, but they are all we have left to give."

i probably would have jumped straight to offering myself really

You are very much that type.

[ but now it's time to wrap the story up-- ]

Satori looked to the gold and then to the boys. For a moment that lasted an eternity there was not a sound in the world. As though time had frozen over. Then a brilliant blue glow overtook the bag. When it faded, the bag deflated as if all the rupees had disappeared. Satori told the brothers to open the bag - when they did, several seeds were inside.

Satori spoke. "From this day onward, our arrangement has changed. Go down to the village below the mountain and plant these seeds. Every month they will grow a bounty of apples, enough to feed all the hungry.

In exchange, the grove beside your home will wither and die. If you value the prosperity of the village over your worship of me, then go with grace. Noble intentions must be seen through to the end."

so satori was basically a bro and told them to maybe move their asses down to the village

[ snort. ]

You enjoy questioning the nature of fables a lot, don't you?

[ not that she minds - this one is just partly made up anyway. ]

The brothers went to the village and showed the village head the seeds, telling him of Satori's request. Together they planted the seeds, and as promised the trees up the mountain withered away soon after. In turn, the newly planted trees grew practically overnight and apples fell from their branches at the end of the month.

And so a new offering was established. Every month the boys would receive a basket of fresh apples, and soon the quaint little village had enough apples to begin trading with other villages. The taste of the fruit was sublime, far more than the typical apple tree, and the village became famous for their signature fruit.

As for the brothers, they took on jobs in the village and helped it flourish throughout the years. And every month they would both take a single apple from their given basket and leave it to Lord of the Mountain, never forgetting his wisdom.

The End.

i think you should professionally go into storytelling
youve earned five prizes

Five coveted no-prizes?

youll have to fight people off for them obviously

Fight them off in a duel of paper and quills? Doesn't sound hard.

or paper rock scissors

If that's what it takes to win the grand prize of nothing, then I accept.

honestly though thanks
for the story
i did appreciate it
and i genuinely think it was pretty damn good

You're very welcome. I hope it lifted your down spirits even the slightest.

Though the story is made up, Satori is a real deity spirit in my homeland. The grove I mentioned is actually not far from where he appears on the mountain top. Nobody knows for sure, but people speculate he loves apples and has his little helpers collect them for him.

have you been to the grove before?

Once. There really were hundreds of apples atop all those trees!

I actually tried to wait for him to appear, to ask for guidance during difficult times. However he is very fickle about when he comes out, and never appeared before me. Not quite the clockwork schedule as in the story.

maybe he was in an apple induced coma nap

You shouldn't speak that way of the Lord. He does curse people.

[ except she's totally smirking behind her screen. ]

to eat apples forever??

Yes, Dave. To eat apples forever.

sign me up for being cursed

Sometimes I worry for you.

[ dave?? ]

who WOULDNT want to eat nothing but apples for eternity

Normal people?

are you saying im not normal
i mean youre not wrong but wow zel cut me to the core why dont you
the apple core
no that doesnt work lets forget i said that

(no subject)

withwisdom - 2018-09-12 19:05 (UTC) - Expand

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